


The Marks We Leave Are Too Often Scars

by crazychelseablue



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-15
Updated: 2014-07-13
Packaged: 2018-01-12 11:34:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 15
Words: 16,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1185762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazychelseablue/pseuds/crazychelseablue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cristiano goes to boarding school and soon realizes that everyone else's lives are just as fucked up as his.</p><p>"When adults say, "Teenagers think they are invincible" with that sly, stupid smile on their faces, they don't know how right they are. We need never be hopeless, because we can never be irreparably broken. We think that we are invincible because we are. We cannot be born, and we cannot die. Like all energy, we can only change shapes and sizes and manifestations. They forget that when they get old. They get scared of losing and failing. But that part of us greater than the sum of our parts cannot begin and cannot end, and so it cannot fail."<br/>-John Green, Looking for Alaska</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. New Kid

**Author's Note:**

> The title for this story came from the quote "The marks humans leave are too often scars" which is from The Fault in our Stars by John Green. The quote in the description is one of my favorite quotes that I felt really applied to this story which basically chronicles the really shitty lives of a bunch of teenage boys.
> 
> There may end up being more relationships and characters than I have listed right now since i'm still working out some parts of the storyline in my head.
> 
> This is also the first time I've ever written anything with smut in it so please go easy on me. I'm currently still looking for a beta so if anyone's interested, let me know. (and sorry I suck so much at using html. If there's anyone who wants to help me with that, too, I would love you forever)
> 
> Now, enjoy! And don't forget to let me know what you think in the comments! :)

Cris stepped out of the cab and onto the pavement in front of the gargantuan grey stone building. Bernabeu Academy. This was it. His new home. His new prison, really. School had started a week ago. It wasn’t bad enough he was going to be the new kid, he had to be the new kid who arrived a week late. fan-fucking-tastic.

They should have been more careful. He knew they should have been more careful. But it was too late, now he was here. Shipped off by a father who couldn’t bear the sight of his gay son. The only good thing about coming here was that it meant no more beatings. You can’t hurt someone who’s a thousand miles away.

He hoisted his bag over his shoulder and grudgingly made his way inside. He went straight to the main office, where they gave him the standard maps, schedules, and room assignment.

“You best go to your room first, dear.” The woman who had just handed him his papers said. She was middle aged and a bit plump, with short, auburn hair. “There you can drop off your things and change into your uniform.” she eyed his faded jeans and plain black t-shirt with a look on her face to make you think they personally offended her.

“Alright, thank you.” he said, making his way out the door as quickly as possible. Bernabeu Academy looked like just one huge stone building from the front, but in truth, behind the main building, which contained the classrooms and offices, there were more stone buildings that looked just like little miniatures of the first. These were the dorms, and behind them, were the athletic facilities.

He made it all the way to the door of his room before he stopped. His palms were sweaty and he was shaking. It had only just hit him that he was actually going to be living here for the next ten months. He looked down at the paper with his room assignment. His roommate’s name was apparently Fernando Torres. The good thing was, class was currently in session, so he wouldn’t have to meet him until later.

He pulled out the key the woman at the front desk had given him and unlocked the door, turning the handle slowly. The room he stepped into was plain, but still had the look of an expensive boarding school. Two beds, two wardrobes, two desks (each complete with a macbook sitting neatly on top), a couch, and a mini fridge. He opened the door to his left to find an ensuite bathroom, too. “Bloody posh school.” he muttered as he closed the door to the bathroom and hoisted his suitcase onto his new bed.

He unpacked as slowly as possible, dreading having to go to class and meet his fellow students. He had gotten quite a good laugh when he found out that the school his dad had chosen was an all boys school. The best way to cure your son of his homosexuality is clearly to surround him with only blokes for ten months out of the year.

After he had finished putting on his new uniform (even the god damn blazer), he stopped and stared at his reflection in the mirror. “Cris,” he sighed “what the hell are you doing here?”

* * *

This was it. The classic moment. It happened in every single movie about High School. The new kid always dreaded lunch because they knew they would have nowhere to sit. The sad thing was that it was so very true. Cris really had been dreading lunch for that age old reason.

He had made it through all those awful introductions, standing in front of the class and hearing the teacher say “Everyone, this is our new student Cristiano Ronaldo.” He had stared into the bored, uncaring faces of his classmates, but as awful as that had been, it was nothing compared to the knowledge that he would probably have to find a bathroom stall to eat lunch in. Maybe he had just watched _Mean Girls_ one too many times, but he felt certain that was going to happen.

He loaded his tray with food and turned around, facing the dining hall full of friends eating and laughing together. He sighed and slowly headed for the doors at the other end of the hall.

“Oi! New kid!” Cristiano’s head whipped around to see a boy at one of the tables to his left smiling at him. “Get your ass over here and sit down.”  
Cris gave the boy a grateful smile as he sat down opposite him. “Hi, I’m David Beckham.” the stranger said as he held out his hand for Cris to shake. “But you can call me Becks.”

“Cristiano Ronaldo.” he said as they shook hands. “But you can call me Cris.”

“Nice to meet ya, mate. The two blokes havin’ a snog next to me are John and Frank. You can meet them properly whenever they decide to come up for air.” Cris laughed and began to think that this place might not be so bad. David was friendly and apparently nobody here had a problem with homosexuality since none of them even looked twice at the two guys having a pretty intense-looking makeout session in the middle of lunch.

“They at it again?” one of David’s friends said as he sat down right next to Cris.

“unfortunately.” David replied “Oh Sergio, this is Cris. Cris, this is Sergio.”

“Hi.” Sergio said as he gave Cris a warm smile. “So, where are you fr-” Sergio was cut off by a boy with short brown hair slamming his tray on the table next to him and sitting down without a word, or even so much as a glance in their direction. “Excuse him,” this time Sergio’s smile was apologetic. “this is how he always acts. This is Fernando. Fernando, this is Cris.”

Fernando grunted, the only acknowledgement he gave that he had even heard him, before continueing to eat his food and stare straight ahead at the wall.

“What’s his problem?” Cris whispered to Sergio.

“It’s a long story.” was the boy’s only reply.

* * *

As Cris entered his room, he was greeted with the sight of Sergio sprawled across Fernando’s bed reading a football magazine and his roommate, the ever-frosty Fernando sitting stiffly at his desk doing homework.

“You will literally never guess who Real Madrid just si-”

“CAN YOU NOT?!” Fernando exploded.

“What?!”

“YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT! IF YOU’RE GONNA DO THAT, THEN YOU MIGHT AS WELL JUST GET OUT SESE!”

“NO!”

“NO?”

“NO! I’M TRYING TO FUCKING HELP YOU. I’M SICK OF ALL THIS SHIT! I JUST WANT THE NANDO I FIRST BECAME FRIENDS WITH BACK!”

“WELL HE’S GONE SESE! HE’S GONE FOREVER AND HE’S NEVER COMING BACK, SO ACCEPT IT OR GET OUT!”

“WELL I CAN’T ACCEPT THAT!”

“THEN GET THE FUCK OUT! NOW! HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO EVER FUCKING TALK ABOUT THAT FUCKING SPORT TO ME? HELL, DON’T TALK ABOUT IT IF YOU’RE WITHIN 50 FEET OF ME! YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU SHOULDN’T EVEN FUCKING THINK ABOUT IT NEAR ME! YOU SHOULDN’T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT AT ALL AFTER WHAT HAPPENED! NOW GET THE FUCK OUT SESE!”

“Giving up football was never the answer, Fer.” Sergio’s voice was calm now, full of pain and sadness. “I’m just trying to show you that.” As he got up to leave, he noticed Cris standing by the door, but didn’t say a word. He stopped when he reached him, leaning in and whispering “Go outside and come back in as if you just got here. You didn’t hear anything, understand?.” Cris nodded and did as he was told.

* * *

Cris lay awake in his bed. The only sound in the room was that of Fernando’s steady breathing. He turned his head towards the clock on his bedside table. The burning red numbers hurt his eyes, but more importantly, told him that it was 4 AM and he was still awake.  
His mind just wouldn’t shut down. It wouldn’t stop replaying the events of last week on repeat. Cris closed his eyes once more, willing himself to fall asleep, but what he was seeing wasn’t a dream, it was a memory.

_“Cris! Oh God Cris!” Ricky screamed, writhing on Cristiano’s bed. Cris held Ricky’s hips down as he once again wrapped his lips around his boyfriend’s aching cock. “Oh Cris. So good.” Ricky gasped out. Cris hummed around his cock and sent his lover into a frenzy of gasps and moans as he continued to deepthroat him. “Cris, Cris, Cris” Ricky screamed as he came and Cristiano did his best to swallow every drop._

_At that moment, the door flew open. Cris’s head whipped around. In the doorway stood his father. Oh God. This was it. This was the day that the beating would actually kill him. He thought it might happen someday. He just never thought it would be today. “Dad.” he choked out as he wiped away the little bit of cum leaking from the corner of his mouth._

Cris’s eyes flew open and he knew there would be no sleep tonight.


	2. My Demons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone has shit to deal with

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title comes from the line "another scar that I will never show and somehow everybody seems to know my demons" from the song This Cigar by Josiah Leming. This song (and this line) will no doubt produce more chapter titles in the future
> 
> I tried to include most (if not all) of the characters that weren't mentioned in the last chapter. If anything was confusing or you find any mistakes just let me know. I'm still looking for a beta so if you want to beta, or if you know anyone who wants to beta, i'd really appreciate the help.
> 
> Please enjoy :) and don't forget to leave comments!

“So why don’t we take a look at the very first line of the book.” Mr Wenger picked up the chalk and began to write on the board.

> It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

“Now, what do you think Austen is trying to say with this, and why do you think she chose this specific line to begin her novel.” Wenger scanned the classroom before his eyes landed on Steven. “Mr Gerrard, what do you think?”

“Um... she’s trying to say that rich men need wives?”

Mr Wenger rolled his eyes and turned to Xabi “Mr Alonso, care to help him?”

“This is a highly satiric line. Austen’s writing in general tends to be heavily sarcastic, and the opening of this book is no exception. Austen is pointing out how ridiculous it is that most women in that time period have that sort of mindset.”

“Perfect.” Mr Wenger smiled at Xabi “Since you’ve been so helpful to him in class today, you are going to be Mr Gerrard’s partner for this project. Everyone else, you may choose your own partners, just let me know who you’re working with by the end of class today.” As he spoke, Wenger began to pass out copies of _Pride and Prejudice_ to all of the students. “You are going to read _Pride and Prejudice_ and pick ten quotes from the book, which you will then write a paper on. The paper should explain both the meaning and the significance of the quotes. Tell me what it is you think Austen was trying to convey. This assignment is due in two weeks.”

As Xabi was packing up his things and mentally preparing himself for the hell that was AP Calculus, he noticed someone standing in front of his desk. He looked up to see Steven glaring at him. “Thanks for makin’ me look bloody stupid. I hope you’re pleased with yourself.”

“It’s not my fault you didn’t know the answer and I did.” Xabi said as he shoved past him. “And by the way” he called as headed out the door “you _are_ bloody stupid.”

* * *

Oscar was digging through his locker looking for his trig book when he felt a hand rest on his ass. “Hey there gorgeous.” the cheeky boy said.

“Leave me alone, Eden.”

“But how could I ever ignore such a hot piece of ass?” Oscar felt the other boy give his ass a squeeze before slapping it and walking away.

David Luiz stormed up to his boyfriend’s locker. “Was he bothering you _again_?!”

“Calm down, David. It doesn’t matter.”

“Doesn’t matter?! Yes it does fucking matter!” David Luiz began to head off in search of Eden but stopped when he felt Oscar’s hand on his chest.

“Please baby, just leave it. Confronting him will only make things worse.”

“But I’m not just gonna let him get away with treating you like that!”

“Just ignore it and maybe one day he’ll stop.”

“Yeah, because that works.” David Luiz muttered, but he listened to Oscar and headed off towards his next class.

* * *

Fernando entered his room to see none other than Daniel Agger lounging on his bed. “What are you doing here.” he spit out.

“Aww, Nando! You could at least pretend to be happy to see me!” It took all the self control Fernando had not to wipe the smug grin of that asshole’s face.

“Just tell me what you’re doing here, Agger.”

“Oh, nothing. Just relaxing after a long day of school. Your bed’s quite comfortable, you know. And it’s a lot less squeaky than mine. Oh, by the way, you might want to wash your sheets. I think Martin and I may have gotten some cum on them.” Fernando clenched his fists and gritted his teeth.

The door swung open and in walked Cristiano. “oh,” he froze when he saw Daniel and Fernando. “I didn’t mean to interrupt anything...”

“Don’t worry about it.” Daniel said as he got off the bed. “I was just leaving. I’m Daniel by the way.”

“Cristiano.” he replied as they shook hands, before watching Daniel saunter out the door. “Um... So... wha-”

“Shut up.” Fernando cut him off and walked over to his desk to start on his homework.

* * *

“So Cris,” Sergio said as he stuffed another fry into his mouth “What class do you have next?”

“You’re disgusting, Sergio. Chew with your mouth closed.” a boy Cris thought he recognized from one of his classes said as he sat down across from them.

“Cris,” Sergio said, little bits of french fry flying out of his mouth, “this is Iker. He’s my stepbrother.”

“Unfortunately.” Iker muttered and then bit into one of his fries, making a point to chew with his mouth closed.

“So anyway,” Sergio turned away from Iker and back to Cris “what do you have next?”

“Um,” Cris glanced at his schedule “Spanish.”

“Yes! You get to meet Raúl!”

“Raúl?”

“He’s the Spanish teacher.”

“And you call him by his first name?”

“Yeah, he’s cool like that. And, he’s totally shagging the music teacher, Guti, even if he won’t admit it.”

“For the last time,” Iker cut in “Raúl is not shagging Guti!”

“Yes he is! I totally saw them sneaking into one of the supply closets once!”

“Have you ever considered the possibility that they were, oh I don’t know, _getting supplies_?”

“Nope.” Sergio said, clearly paying no attention to his stepbrother’s theory. “So what do you have after Spanish?”

“Art.”

“Ooh, you get to meet Mr Drogba! He’s like, one of the coolest guys ever. What do you have for last period, then?”

“I have a free period, so I was just gonna go to my room and get some homework done while Fernando isn’t there.” Cris refused to make eye contact with Sergio as he admitted his desire to avoid the other boy’s best friend.

“What’s so bad about Fernando being there?” Sergio’s tone was curious, but there was something in his eyes that told Cristiano to tread carefully.

“Nothing’s wrong with him being there, he just sends off an... uncomfortable vibe, ya know? He always seems so angry.”

“Yeah, well he has a whole lot to be fucking angry about.” Sergio muttered and the three boys remained silent for the rest of lunch.

* * *

“Cris! Cristiano! Wait up!” he turned to see none other than Sergio sprinting down the hall towards him. “Hey,” he began breathlessly. “So I meant to ask you something at lunch before... you know.”

“Okay, what?” Cris was tired and just wanted to get back to his room and start working.

“I was hoping that, since you have a free period, you might come to my guitar lesson with me. Please? You’d get to meet Guti.”

“Sorry Serg, I’m not in the mood.” he said before walking away without so much as a glance behind him.

* * *

“He was in your room again? Fer! Why didn’t you tell me last night when it happened?!” Sergio began pacing the room in frustration.

“Because I didn’t really wanna talk about it!”

“I’m your best friend, you idiot! You’re supposed to tell me when things like that happen!”

“Sese stop pacing.” Fer said softly as he gently pushed Sergio backwards until he hit the wall. He grabbed his friend’s wrists and pinned them above his head. “Sese.” he breathed as he made a trail of kisses down the other boy’s jaw and moved to suck on his neck.

“What about your roommate?” Sergio asked breathlessly.

“He’s at the library.” Fernando kept his wrists pinned with one hand, and moved the other hand down to grip Sergio’s half hard cock, making him groan.

“Wait, Fernando. No.” Sergio said as he did his best to break away from Fernando.

“Why?”

“I’m not your fuck toy, Fer.” his voice was firm as he tried to free his wrists, but his friend’s grip was too strong.

“I know that. You’re my friend. Friends are supposed to help each other, right Sese? I’m asking you to help me. Help me to forget. Please. I just need to forget.”

Sergio looked into the eyes of his best friend in the world and saw all the pain and sadness in them. He would do anything to take away that pain. “Okay.” he said as he grabbed Fer’s hand and led him towards the bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, any guesses as to what's going on with Nando? I'd love to hear what you guys think it is!


	3. Stand There and Watch Me Burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really short chapter today, sorry. It's about a 3rd the size of a normal chapter. This was supposed to be part of a longer chapter which I was going to post in a few days, but after writing this I just really needed to put it up ASAP. I didn't edit this all that much so sorry if its bad and let me know if there's any mistakes.
> 
> There will be a longer chapter soon, I promise.
> 
> (in case you didn't know, the chapter title comes from Love the Way You Lie by Rihanna)

Fernando’s locker slammed closed, nearly taking his hand off. He turned to his right to find Daniel Agger grinning mischieviously. Without a word from the other boy, Fernando was slammed against the lockers. Before Fernando even knew what was happening he felt a fist make contact with his face. Then another. And another. Left hook. Right hook. Left Hook. Right hook. Daniel punched in rhythm.

Finally, the onslaught of fists ceased. If Dagger hadn’t still been pinning him to the lockers, there was no doubt that he would be on the floor by now. When Fernando tried looking around, everything was blurry, he was pretty sure he had a concussion. Probably a bad one, too, but he could still make out the outline of Sergio turning his back and silently walking away.

To anyone else, it would look like Sergio didn’t care, but Fernando knew the truth behind his best friend’s leaving. Sergio knew that Nando couldn’t defend himself. If either of them tried to stop him, Dagger would tell the world his secret. Sergio only walked away because he couldn’t watch his best friend just stand there and take it without fighting back.

Fernando was brought back to reality as his head was slammed back against the lockers. 1 2 3 4. 1 2 3 4. The neverending drum beat of Fernando’s pain. 1 2 3 4. He was sure that if he hadn’t gotten a concussion before, he would have one now, unless Daniel just ended up killing him instead. 1 2 3 4. He felt the blood from his head running down his neck. 1 2 3 4. And finally, it stopped.

But if Fernando had thought this hell would be over, he was severely disappointed. Now Dagger moved on to the rest of him. The next fist made contact with Fernando’s stomach. Upon impact, he doubled over and began to vomit. Then he took a Knee to the groin. And another punch to his stomach. More vomit. It was a wonder there was any left. Fernando soon became lost in the haze of pain and exhaustion. He could no longer feel the individual blows, just the overwhelming agony surrounding his whole body.

The beating stopped, and he heard muffled voices, but he was only able to maintain consciousness for a few seconds before giving in to the darkness.

* * *

Xabi and Steven were bickering as they walked down the hall to the library. Steven, naturally, wanted Xabi to do all the work for their project and just put both of their names on it at the end. Xabi, naturally, was not going to stand for that.

“Look,” Xabi argued “I’ll give you the easiest quotes I can possibly find. You won’t even have to actually read the book! Just read the context and write the...” Xabi froze, causing Steven to run into him. “Oh my god...” Steven followed Xabi’s gaze to where he could see Daniel Agger beating the absolute shit out of Fernando Torres.

“Oh fuck.” Steven breathed before jumping into action. He sprinted towards the two boys and threw himself onto Dagger, effectively tackling his unsuspecting teammate to the ground. “DAGGER WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!” He screamed as he shook him. The younger boy’s hands were covered in Fernando’s blood. So was his shirt. He couldn’t believe no one had stopped him. Everyone had just stood by and watched. Where was Sergo? And why hadn’t Fernando fought back?

Steven turned his head to see Xabi checking Fernando’s pulse and then trying to stop the bleeding from his head. Once he realized that it was impossible, he hoisted the seemingly unconscious boy over his shoulder and as quickly as he could manage, headed towards the school infirmary.

What the hell was going on here? Steven couldn’t help but wonder...


	4. Those Who Know Secret Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone was begging me to put the next chapter up, so I wrote and edited this whole thing tonight. If there are some mistakes and/or awkward/nonsensical sentences, I apologize. Just let me know and I'll fix them.
> 
> The chapter title comes from a quote by Rainer Maria Rilke "I want to be with those who know secret things or else alone."

The sound of music drifted towards Cris from behind the door to his room. Someone was singing and playing an acoustic guitar. He opened the door and peered inside to see Sergio on Fernando’s bed, strumming away. Cris never would have guessed that Sergio would be able to play and sing so well. It really was beautiful.

“What are you singing?” Cris asked softly as he entered the room.

Sergio’s head snapped up. “Cris,” he said, “Jesus, you scared me. I didn’t know anyone was listening. It’s a song by my favorite musician, Dani Martín.”

“What’s it called?” his voice was still soft as he sat hesitantly on the bed next to Sergio.

“16 Añitos.”

“And what does the song say? I don’t speak Spanish.”

Sergio spoke softly, lost in thought as he explained the meaning of the song that had become his anthem, and more importantly, Fernando’s.

* * *

> 16 añitos fiera  
>  me creía el rey del mundo  
>  con mi lema por bandera  
>  lo que digan yo no escucho 
> 
> No había nadie que pudiera lograr  
>  que cambiara un poco el rumbo  
>  con mi idea la primera  
>  y que no agobiaran mucho 
> 
> Y así fue  
>  me revele contra todo hasta el sol  
>  viviendo entonces una distorsión  
>  y me enfadé con el mundo  
>  malditos complejos que siempre sacan lo peor! 
> 
> Pensé "en la fuerza estará lo mejor"  
>  me disfrace de uno que no era yo  
>  buscando esa firmeza  
>  llegué a un lugar negro  
>  pensé que eso era el valor 
> 
> Y sufrí de tal manera  
>  por dejar de ser quien era  
>  por pensar que ser cobarde  
>  era ser lo que creyera 
> 
> Los valientes son los que son de verdad  
>  y los fuertes ni sus guerras  
>  los valientes los que saben llorar  
>  con la cara descubierta 
> 
> Y así fue  
>  me revele contra todo hasta el sol  
>  viviendo entonces una distorsión  
>  y me enfadé con el mundo  
>  malditos complejos que siempre sacan lo peor! 
> 
> Pensé "en la fuerza estará lo mejor"  
>  me disfrace de uno que no era yo  
>  buscando esa firmeza  
>  llegué a un lugar negro  
>  pensé que eso era el valor..el valor... 
> 
> y es mirarme ahora a la cara  
>  y ser quien soy! 
> 
> Y así fue  
>  me revele contra todo hasta el sol  
>  viviendo entonces una distorsión  
>  y me enfadé con el mundo  
>  malditos complejos que siempre sacan lo peor! 
> 
> Pensé "en la fuerza estará lo mejor"  
>  me disfrace de uno que no era yo  
>  buscando esa firmeza  
>  llegué a un lugar negro  
>  pensé que eso era el valor

* * *

It had been hours since Cristiano walked in on Sergio playing his music. After Sergio played a few more songs (at Cris’s request), they had just started talking. They talked about everything and nothing. Cris had even told Sergio the story of his Dad walking in on him with Ricky and how he was sent here as ‘punishment’. Now they were both lying on the bed, side by side, staring at the ceiling.

Cris noticed Sergio’s arm starting to move towards him before the boy seemingly changed his mind and pulled it back. This happened several times before he finally made up his mind and put his arm around Cris and pulled him closer.

“So, I was wondering, do you like football?” Sergio asked, completely out of the blue.

“When I was a kid, I used to play in the park with some other boys. I absolutely loved it. Then my dad found out and immediately put a stop to it. I haven’t played since. I also used to sneak up into my parent’s bedroom, where the tv was, to watch matches. My mum knew, and she would help me out by making sure my dad didn’t go up there. It wasn’t until I was older that I realized she had taken beatings from that bastard just so that I could watch football. She told me she would hide it because she wanted me to have something in my life that made me happy. A ‘ray of sunshine amidst the darkness’ she called it. You know, she always encouraged me to dream. She told me that if I worked hard enough, I could achieve anything. After she died, I learned the harsh reality that happiness cannot be attained through any amount of effort or determination.”

“How did she die?” Sergio began to gently run his hand through Cris’s hair.

“Car accident. My dad’s fault. He was shitface drunk but decided to drive anyway. My mum tried to convince him it would be better if she drove because she was completely sober. He wouldn’t listen. He ran straight into a pole. It was her side of the car that hit. She died instantly. I was in the back seat, saw the whole thing happen. I was only 10.”

“Oh Cris. I’m so sorry.” Sergio pulled Cris into a warm embrace and just held him, swearing to himself and any gods that may be out there that he was never going to let go.

* * *

Daniel opened the door to Fernando’s room in the infirmary. The look on his face when he realized who was in his room was priceless to Daniel. Pure fear. “Hello, Fernando.” he sneered.

“D-Daniel” Fernando had tried to keep his voice steady but failed miserably.

“How ya feelin’?”

“Gr-great, thanks.”

“Hmm...” Daniel frowned, “that’s too bad.” he turned and locked the door moving closer to the terrified boy on the bed. “Listen Fernando,” he said when he was right next to the bed. “I’m getting sick of keeping my mouth shut. I think that pretty soon, everyone else may just have to find out about your little secret. Unless you think you can persuade me otherwise?”

“Anything.” Fernando’s voice was somehow firm. “I’ll do anything.”

“Anything?” his eyebrows rose and he couldn’t keep the smirk off his face.

Without a word, Fernando got out of the bed, ignoring the pain, and knelt down in front of Daniel, quickly undoing his tormentor’s zipper.

Daniel’s eyes were wide and his eyebrows had just about reached his hairline. This wasn’t at all what he had expected. But hey, if Torres was offering, he wasn’t about to say no.

Fernando pulled out Daniel’s cock and began slowly stroking it. Once it was half hard, he put the tip in his mouth and began to swirl his tongue around it. “Jesus fucking christ!” Daniel threw his head back. His cock left the other boy’s mouth with a pop, before he felt a tongue licking it from base to tip. Dagger grabbed Fernando by the hair and forced the injured boy to deepthroat him. He began to moan out a constant stream of ‘oh fuck’s and ‘so good’s and the occasional ‘oh god, Torres, do that again.’

Daniel had already let go of Fernando’s hair. He was bobbing his head and making those delicious sounds all on his own. It wasn’t long before Daniel came, making sure Fernando swallowed it all before zipping up and heading for the door. “I always knew you were a little slut, Torres.”

Fernando watched as the door slammed behind Dagger. He didn’t have the strength to get back into bed, so he stayed kneeling on the floor, supporting himself with his hands, and cried.

* * *

“Steven, Xabi,” Mr Wenger called as everyone was leaving the classroom. “Come here please.”

They shot each other questioning looks as they approached his desk. To their surprise, Wenger handed them back their paper and said “This was very good boys. Well done. In light of this, I would like you two to be partners for the rest of the year."

“What?!” Steven asked incredulously at the same time as Xabi’s “Are you kidding me?!”

“Please tell me you’re not serious.” Steven knew it was pointless but he had to at least try.

“Mr Wenger,” Xabi put on his ‘reasonable’ voice. “A corpse would be a better partner than this guy. It’d at least have a higher IQ.”

“I don’t want to hear it, boys. My decision is final.” and with that, he turned and walked into his office, closing the door behind him.

Steven turned slowly towards his (now permanent) English partner. “A CORPSE WOULD HAVE A HIGHER IQ?!?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some translated lines from 16 añitos, the song Sergio and Fernando seem to identify with.  
> "and so it was  
> I revealed myself against everything up to the sun  
> living then a distortion  
> and I was angry at the world  
> damned complex that always brings out the worst"
> 
> "I was disguised as one I was not  
> looking for that firmness  
> I came to a black place  
> I thought that there was value"
> 
> "and I suffered in such a way  
> by ceasing to be the one who was"
> 
> "the brave are those who are of truth"
> 
> "brave men who know how to cry  
> with an open face"
> 
> Sergio not only identifies with the song himself, he sees just how much it applies to Fernando, and that's what makes it so beautiful to him. (If you want the full translation, I can give it to you. I translated the whole song from the original Spanish.)


	5. I Can't Tell You the Truth Until I Tell Myself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry I took so long to update. I got busier than I thought I would be. I hope this chapter isn't too bad, but I'm not really sure about it. I wrote an edited the whole thing pretty quickly (I seem to be making a habit of that). Be sure to let me know what you think :)

Sergio didn’t know why he even bothered visiting Iker. He was always in such a bad mood. He didn’t really need Iker’s pessimism in his life. He had enough of his own, plus Fernando’s.

As he approached Iker’s door, it flew open and none other than Eden Hazard sauntered out, shirtless, and grinning from ear to ear. “Ugh, gross.” Sergio muttered under his breath.

After Eden had passed, Sergio made his way into Iker’s room. “Really? Eden Hazard?”

Iker looked up from putting his socks back on. “Yeah. He’s a good fuck” he said simply.

“God, Iker. Are your standards really that low?” Sergio plopped onto Iker’s roommate’s bed (Was the kid’s name Orville? Oswald? Oscar?) crossing his arms and waiting for his step brother to explain himself.

“I don’t have standards, Sergio. But I do have needs.”

“Fine, but don’t blame me when you have an STD.”

“Oh, Sergio! I forgot to tell you! There’s this great new invention called a condom!” that was all Sergio heard before he was hit in the face by a box of condoms.

* * *

“Steven Gerrard, where is your shirt?” the look on Xabi’s face was absolutely priceless.

“I came right from football practice because you said exactly 5:30 and I know how anal you are about these things. I didn’t have time to take off my boots and shin guards, let alone put on a shirt.”

“Well,” Xabi said like he was talking to a 5 year old. “go put some real clothes on, then come back and we can work.”

“No bloody way! I’m not walking back down 3 flights of stairs, across the whole quad, up 4 more flights of stairs, and then all the way back when I’m already exhausted just because you would rather I had a shirt on.”

“Fucker.” Xabi muttered, but dropped the subject.

* * *

“Xabi-”

“No.”

“But-”

“No.”

“C’mon-”

“NO.”

“Please-”

“FOR FUCK’S SAKE STEVEN JUST SHUT UP AND READ THE GODDAMN BOOK!”

“But It’s so long! And there are so many words!”

“Yes Steven, books tend to have lots of words in them. Congratulations on that ground breaking observation.”

“Why can’t you just summarize it for me?”

“Because I’m not letting you get away with not reading anything for English this whole year. You need to actually do some fucking work.”

“Ugh FINE.” Steven went back to _The Great Gatsby_ , a look of intense concentration on his face. Xabi chuckled at the funny lines that appeared on his forehead. Well, at least he was actually trying.

Xabi had read _The Great Gatsby_ years ago, but decided to reread it when Mr Wenger assigned it. That had taken him all of an hour and a half (and he had been going slow). Now he had nothing to do but let his eyes wander around the room. He tried to tell himself that it was a coincidence when his eyes kept wandering towards the shirtless boy on the next bed over. Steven really was a fit guy.

Looking at the veins in his strong arms, all Xabi could think was how he wanted to go over there and trace them with his fingers, run his hands over Steven’s muscular chest. Wait, what?

* * *

“Okay,” Sergio said. “let’s start with penalties. You stand here.” he moved Cris to the penalty spot and placed the ball in front of him.

Sergio used his hands to guide Cris’s legs as he taught him the mechanics of taking a penalty. “Now,” he said. “let’s try it.” He moved into goal, waiting for Cristiano’s first try. He knew he was a terrible goalie, but that didn’t really matter. It was Cris’s first time. There was no way he was going to need to make any saves. Or so he thought.

Cris was a monster. Ball after ball flew straight into the corner of the net. He hadn’t missed a single shot. Sergio was exhausted. He hadn’t expected he’d have to do so much work. He had given the job of goalkeeper his all, but hadn’t saved a single one of Cristiano’s miraculous penalties.

“How the fuck did you do that?!” he was completely incredulous as he made his way over to Cris.

Cris just shrugged. “I did what you told me to do.”

“I’ve never seen anyone do that on their first try!”

“I guess you’re a good teacher then.” Cris was looking at the ground and making a hole in the grass with his boot.

“No no no. That had nothing to do with my teaching. You have a gift, man. You have a gift from the gods or something. You have to try out for the football team."

“Sese, the season has already started. It’s too late to try out.”

“Who cares?? After a few more lessons you’ll be the best footballer at this school!”

“Sese-”

“Just give it a shot. Please. We’ll have a few more lessons and then I’ll talk to Mou. I’m sure he’ll give you a trial.”

“Sese?” both of their heads whipped around to see Fernando standing by the bleachers. He was visibly shaking. “Sese, I’ve been looking everywhere for you. It’s today. It’s been a year today. You promised I wouldn’t have to spend it alone. You promised, Sese.” his voice was soft and almost pleading. He looked more scared and vulnerable than Cris had ever seen him.

“Boys? What are you all doing on the pitch at this hour?” Mr Mourinho, the football coach, said as he approached them. He had only been looking at Cristiano and Sergio, but as he got closer, he noticed Fernando. “Oh, Fernando. How nice to see you again.” The smile on the man’s face appeared pleasant, but there was a glint in his eyes that told a different story.

The only thing Fernando knew was that he had to get away. He knew he shouldn’t have come back here. He knew it was a bad idea. So he ran. He ran as fast and as far as he could. He ran until until he had left the pitch far behind him. He ran until the wind dried the tears that he had tried not to let fall. He ran until every single muscle in his body was screaming. And still he ran. He was miles off campus now. The air was cold and he watched as the dark clouds that had been hanging overhead all day finally let go and it began to pour. He ran even as he was soaked by the icy rain. He ran until the pain and adrenaline drowned out every other thought. He ran faster and farther than he had ever run before. He ran into oblivion.


	6. Communication Is Key

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Text conversations between the characters on the night that the last chapter left off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's a bit mean to give you this instead of a real chapter but I was for some reason just really inspired to write this chapter. I always love it when I read stories and they have either texting or IMing conversations between the characters so maybe you'll enjoy this? Let me know what you think :)

**_Sergio Ramos_ **

**Sent Messages:  
** **To: Fernando Torres**  
fer where are you?!

**To: Fernando Torres**  
fer seriously im getting worried

**To: Fernando Torres**  
fer im not kidding stop fucking around and answer your goddamn phone

**To: Fernando Torres**  
look im sorry okay? i forgot and i know that was wrong but all i can do is say im sorry and ask you to come back from wherever the fuck you are

**To: Fernando Torres**  
please come back

**To: Fernando Torres**  
fer cant we just talk? will you please come home and talk? ill kick cris out of your room for tonight. he can stay in my room with becks. itll be just us. we can talk and do whatever else you want

**To: Fernando Torres**  
fer please youre killing me. just come home. please

 

**From: Xabi Alonso  
** **To: Steven Gerrard**  
Did you finish yet?

**From: Steven Gerrard  
** **To: Xabi Alonso**  
no! we dont all read as fast as u

**From: Xabi Alonso  
** **To: Steven Gerrard**  
I understand that your brain is very small and cannot hold that much information but I would appreciate it if you would use correct spelling and punctuation whilst you are talking to me.

**From: Steven Gerrard  
** **To: Xabi Alonso**  
y?

**From: Xabi Alonso  
** **To: Steven Gerrard**  
You did that just to annoy me, didn’t you?

**From: Steven Gerrard  
** **To: Xabi Alonso**  
4 sure

**From: Xabi Alonso  
** **To: Steven Gerrard**  
I am never texting you ever again.

**From: Steven Gerrard  
** **To: Xabi Alonso**  
hey u txtd me 1st

**From: Xabi Alonso  
** **To: Steven Gerrard**  
You are a twat.

 

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
hey sweet cheeks

**From: Oscar Emboaba  
** **To: Eden Hazard**  
this is eden isnt it?

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
you betcha

**From: Oscar Emboaba  
** **To: Eden Hazard**  
how the fuck did you even get this number?

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
a magician never reveals his secrets

**From: Oscar Emboaba  
** **To: Eden Hazard**  
goodbye eden

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
no baby come back!

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
come on sweetheart

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
ugh fine. just wait. one day youll change your mind

 

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Iker Casillas**  
wanna fuck?

**From: Iker Casillas  
** **To: Eden Hazard**  
you know i do

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Iker Casillas**  
yours or mine?

**From: Iker Casillas  
** **To: Eden Hazard**  
oscar is here so my room is out

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Iker Casillas**  
dont worry im sure i can get martin to fuck off for a little while. come over in 10?

**From: Iker Casillas  
** **To: Eden Hazard**  
cant wait

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Iker Casillas**  
oh can you bring the lube and condoms? im out

**From: Iker Casillas  
** **To: Eden Hazard**  
hahaha you little slut. youre lucky i have some otherwise wed be stuck with just bjs

**From: Eden Hazard  
** **To: Iker Casillas**  
youre just as lucky as i am but since we both give such excellent bjs anyway that wouldnt actually be that bad

**From: Iker Casillas  
** **To: Eden Hazard**  
;) be over in ten

 

**From: Martin Skrtel  
** **To: Daniel Agger**  
im getting kicked out of my room for a little while. wanna have some fun?

**From: Daniel Agger  
** **To: Martin Skrtel**  
hell yeah. where?

**From: Martin Skrtel  
** **To: Daniel Agger**  
your roommate in?

**From: Daniel Agger  
** **To: Martin Skrtel**  
yeah stevens in

**From: Martin Skrtel  
** **To: Daniel Agger**  
time to get creative

**From: Daniel Agger  
** **To: Martin Skrtel**  
bathroom?

**From: Martin Skrtel  
** **To: Daniel Agger**  
boring

**From: Daniel Agger  
** **To: Martin Skrtel**  
football field?

**From: Martin Skrtel  
** **To: Daniel Agger**  
under the bleachers or on the actual field?

**From: Daniel Agger  
** **To: Martin Skrtel**  
field

**From: Martin Skrtel  
** **To: Daniel Agger**  
YES. be there in 5

 

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo  
** **To: Sergio Ramos**  
sese what just happened?

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo  
** **To: Sergio Ramos**  
sese will you please explain to me what is going on

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo  
** **To: Sergio Ramos**  
my roommate has just gone missing i think its time to tell me what the fuck is going on

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo  
** **To: Sergio Ramos**  
sese please

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo  
** **To: Sergio Ramos**  
come over?

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo  
** **To: Sergio Ramos**  
sergio will you please stop ignoring me

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo  
** **To: Sergio Ramos**  
i just want to help. let me help

**From: Sergio Ramos  
** **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
its nothing. goodnight cris

 

**_Sergio Ramos_ **

**Sent Messages:  
** **To: Fernando Torres**  
fernando you shouldnt be alone right now

**To: Fernando Torres**  
please fer. ill do anything if you just come back

**To: Fernando Torres**  
just let me know that youre okay?

**To: Fernando Torres**  
fer please just dont do anything stupid

**To: Fernando Torres**  
just tell me where you are and i can come and get you okay?

**To: Fernando Torres**  
or i could just go there and we could talk

**To: Fernando Torres**  
fernando please youre scaring me

**To: Fernando Torres**  
please


	7. Call Me Cris

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that this chapter is kind of short. And also kind of bad.

Fernando sighed as his phone buzzed again. He knew it was Sergio, and that he was probably getting worried, but he just wasn’t ready to talk to him yet.

He didn’t know where he was, and therefore had no idea how to get home. As shitty as the situation was, he couldn’t bring himself to regret running. Maybe it was what he needed. The adrenaline felt good. He hadn’t felt that rush in so long. Not since football, and god did he miss it.

But right now he needed to focus on getting back to school. He didn’t have any money with him, so that ruled out taxis and any form of public transportation. He would gladly walk, if only he knew where the bloody hell he was. He could call Sese to come and get him? No. No, he couldn’t do that. But, who else was there? It’s not like he had a lot of friends. It was really just Sese.

He pulled out his phone and started scrolling through the (very small) address book. **_Sergio_** nope. **_Becks_** he barely knew the guy. **_Iker_** definitely not. **_Xabi_** his biology partner? Not a chance. **_Steven_** no. He wasn’t about to face anyone from the football team. Not today. **_Mum_** Fernando actually laughed out loud at the idea of calling his mother in this situation. **_Israel_** that would be just as bad as calling his mother. **_Cristiano_** nah... wait... Cristiano? He was pretty much out of phone contacts. Cristiano was his best option.

* * *

Cris jumped as his phone began to ring, diving for it in the hopes of seeing Sergio’s name on the screen. He froze when he saw who the caller was. Fernando? Why was Fernando calling him after running away? Why not Sergio? Well, no matter what the reasons behind it were, he’d better answer.

“Fernando?”

“Um... yeah... hi Cristiano.”

“Um... hi.”

“So... um... I kind of... need your help.”

“With what? Where are you?”

“That’s kind of the problem. I don’t know.”

“Well can you see the name of the street?”

“Yeah, but I don’t know how to get back to school from here.”

“Okay, don’t worry. Just tell me the name of the street and I’ll take a cab and come pick you up.”

“Thanks, Cristiano.”

* * *

Fernando stood as the cab pulled up to the curb and Cristiano got out. “Fernando, are you okay?” Fernando froze as Cristiano’s arms wrapped around him, before relaxing and returning the hug.

“No.” he said into Cris’s shoulder.

“Come on, Fernando. Let’s go home.” Cris tried to pull away but Fernando wouldn’t let him.

“I don’t want to have to face Sergio.” Fer said, refusing to make eye contact with Cris as he spoke.

“You won’t have to. We’ll go straight to our room and lock the door, yeah?”

“Yeah, okay.”

* * *

Cris finally decided to break the silence in the taxi. “Fernando?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you ever going to tell me what’s going on?”

“Yeah, just... not tonight. Okay?” Cristiano frowned, but didn't say anything. “I just really can’t talk about it tonight. Please, Cristiano?”

“Fine.” There was another long stretch of silence before he added “You can call me Cris, you know. We’re friends now. Aren’t we?”

Fernando nodded his head. “Yeah, we’re friends.”


	8. Obstinacy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's a bit short. Sorry. The next chapter will be up soon, though. 
> 
> I think we should just start off with these wonderful poems that my friend Alice wrote.
> 
> #1  
> Dear, dear Xabi  
> Listen to me  
> You’re not getting Stevie’s D  
> Until you return to LFC
> 
> #2  
> Xabi Alonso has a foot  
> (Oh my god so do I)  
> Xabi Alonso broke his foot  
> And made all the fangirls cry
> 
> #3  
> Steven George Gerrard  
> You make Xabi Alonso hard  
> You're Liverpool's number one star  
> Steven George Gerrard
> 
> Steven George Gerrard  
> I ship you with Frank Lampard  
> But only when you're at Wembley  
> Steven George Gerrard
> 
> A souser through and through  
> You never let us lose  
> A hero no matter what  
> Xabi thinks you're pretty hot

“I locked the- woooooah what is that.” Cris froze as he saw the large bottle in Fer’s hand.

“What the fuck does it look like?” Fernando said before opening the bottle and taking a swig.

“It looks like a fantastic way to an early grave, is what it looks like.”

“Right now, this bottle of Jack is the only thing _keeping_ me from an early grave.”

Cris sighed in defeat and flopped down onto his bed. “You wanna talk about it?”

“Nope.”

“You _need_ to talk about it?”

“What I _need_ is to be so drunk that I don’t know my own name, let alone my past. So just shut up and let me drink my fucking whiskey.”

It turned out that Fernando was actually very good at chugging alcohol. The bottle of whiskey was empty in record time. Fernando looked at the empty bottle forlornly before crawling across the floor (seeing as he was much too drunk to stand up) to his closet and grabbing a bottle of rum from his stash.

“Nando, maybe that’s not such a good idea? I mean, you’ve already downed an entire bottle of whiskey by yourself.”

“Whether or not I drink is my choice.” He slurred as he crawled back across the floor to lean against the foot of his bed. “And right now, I want to drink.”

“Fernando-” Cris started, but was cut off by a bottlecap hitting him square in the face.

* * *

Once Fernando had finally drunk himself into oblivion (ie finished the bottle of rum), Cris slowly made his way over to the seemingly unconscious boy on the floor. “Alright Fernando, time to get up.” Cris grunted as he attempted to hoist the drunken boy onto his bed. It took a couple tries but he eventually succeeded in dragging Fernando onto the mattress before stripping him down to his underwear and pulling the covers up over him.

As he began to turn towards his own bed, he was stopped by a hand on his wrist. “Cris?” mumbled an intoxicated Fernando.

“Yeah Nando?”

“Stay with me? I don’t want to be alone.” his voice was so soft and vulnerable that Cris just couldn’t say no. He sighed in defeat (again) as he pulled on his pajama bottoms and climbed into his nearly unconscious friend’s bed. It wasn’t long before the sound of Fernando’s soft, steady breathing as well as the exhaustion of the day won out, pulling Cris into the welcoming arms of sleep.

* * *

“Are you ever gonna tell me what it is you’ve got on Fernando?” Martin asked as he exited Daniel’s ensuite bathroom.

“Not a fucking chance.” Daniel said. They had had this discussion before. Martin was a notoriously curious creature and it was absolutely killing him that Daniel knew something he didn’t, but this was one piece of information that Daniel was not sharing.

“Why not?”

“We’ve been through this before, Martin.” he said.

“Well let’s go through it again.” he said as he climbed on top of the other boy.

“Because I prefer to be the only one who holds power in any given situation and you know that. In this case, if I told you, you would hold the same amount of power over that freckle-faced little slut. I don’t want that. I want to know that I’m the only one who can control him. The only one who can have the effect on him that I do.” Daniel had gotten a far off look and seemed to forget completely that Martin was even in the room with him. It was about time he changed that, he thought, licking his lips and moving down towards Daniel’s zipper.

* * *

“Done!” Steven screamed, throwing _The Great Gatsby_ across the room. It smacked against the wall before falling miserably to the floor.

“You did not just throw a book.” Xabi said with barely contained frustration and anger.

“Calm down, princess, it’s just paper and ink. The wall can’t hurt it.”

“That’s disrespectful.”

“What, do you think I hurt the book’s feelings? I guess I should probably apologize, then. Hey, dead tree, sorry I threw you against a wall that contains more dead tree. It was very rude of me. I’ll throw you against a wall made of metal next time.”

“That’s a cinder block wall, you idiot. Read a book.”

“I just did!”


	9. Words Speak Louder Than Actioins

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bolding in html is a real bitch. The things I do for love.
> 
> The texts are normal, but the rest is in italics just to set it apart.

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
fers here

**From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
what?????!!!!!!!!!!!!! how????!!!!! since when???????!!!!

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
hes been here since last night

**From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
and you didn’t think to fucking tell me until now?!

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
maybe i would have if you hadnt been ignoring me. anyway i had to promise i wouldnt tell you to get him to come back in the first place

**From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
you got him home?! and why wont he talk to me???

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
he called me and asked me to pick him up so i did. i cant tell you why hes avoiding you because i dont know. i dont know because neither of you will tell me what the fuck is going on

**From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
im coming over

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
no youre not. he doesnt want to see you

**From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
yes is am. i dont care

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
well im not letting you in sergio so just back the fuck off

_Cristiano looked down at the sleeping boy. Fer’s arms were wrapped tightly around his waist and their legs were tangled together. He looked so peaceful while he slept. No more secrets, no more pain. Cris carefully placed his phone back on the bedside table, so as not to wake him, before snuggling into the warmth of Fernando’s arms and falling easily back to sleep._

 

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
your brother is freaking the fuck out

**From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
step brother

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
jfc iker. fine. your step brother is freaking the fuck out

**From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
early. must sleep

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
iker its 11am

**From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
saturday

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
i think you should come talk to him

**From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
saturday

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
im not kidding iker

**From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
SATURDAY

_Iker threw his phone in the general direction of the couch, hoping it landed on the soft cushions, but not actually caring enough to check. He curled up next to the warm mass that was Eden, and sank back into sleep within seconds._

 

**From: Steven Gerrard**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso**  
when is our english paper do again

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: Steven Gerrard**  
*due

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: Steven Gerrard**  
You haven’t started that yet?! It’s due tomorrow! If I get a bad grade because you like to procrastinate, I will personally strangle you.

**From: Steven Gerrard**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso**  
calm down princess no need to get your panties in a twist. i can handle this

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: Steven Gerrard**  
I swear to god if you call me princess one more time

**From: Steven Gerrard**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso**  
what would you prefer, the queen of sequins and sparkles and all things fabulous?

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: Steven Gerrard**  
What the fuck is up with you?

**From: Steven Gerrard**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso**  
nothing i just found out something interesting thats all

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: Steven Gerrard**  
Oh yeah? And what’s that?

**From: Steven Gerrard**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso**  
that youre a faggot

_Xabi stared at his phone in horror. His mouth hung open and he was completely frozen with shock. He couldn’t believe Steven had really just said those words. He was pretty sure he could feel something breaking inside of him, though he wasn’t quite sure what. He had thought... no it was stupid. Nevermind. He didn’t know why he had ever even thought that in the first place. He should never have expected anything different from Steven. He slammed his phone down on his desk and put his head in his hands, trying not to let the tears fall, but failing miserably. How could he have been so stupid?_

 

**From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
hey, i got you a trial for the football team. today at 3

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
who said i wanted to be on the football team?

**From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
look cris, i know youre mad at me, but im sorry ok? im really really really sorry. and now im just trying to do somethign nice for you. youre an amazing footballer even if you dont have a lot of experience. you have a gift. dont let that go to waste just because your father is a huge asshole and im an even bigger one

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
fine sese. ill be there

 

**From: Juan Mata**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
fernando? are you okay?

**From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Juan Mata**  
i have a bitch of a hangover, but thats it. why?

**From: Juan Mata**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
fer... I just heard the voicemail you left me last night...

**From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Juan Mata**  
oh fuck! i was so drunk last night fucking hell what did i say?!

**From: Juan Mata**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
you said its over. you said that you dont love me anymore and that this long distance thing was never going to work. is it true? do you really think that?

**From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Juan Mata**  
oh fuck juan im so sorry. i didnt mean for it to happen like that. fucking hell. im so so sorry. im just dealing with so much shit right now. i cant handle trying to have a long distance relationship and especially not one that i have to keep a secret and just shit juan im so sorry. god fucking dammit.

**From: Juan Mata**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
no. dont worry about it. its fine

**From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Juan Mata**  
no its not fine. im sorry juan. im so so sorry. you deserve a whole lot better than me

_Juan sat alone in his room in Manchester. He couldn’t bring himself to respond. He just sat there, looking down at his phone with tears streaming down his face. “I love you” he whispered, though he knew Fer would never hear him._

 

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
Hey, Becks? Can I talk to you about something?

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso**  
sure thing xabs. im forever the group therapist. what’s this about?

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
Steven.

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso.**  
steven?

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
Can we talk in person?

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso**  
sure. sergios in, so if you want this to be private we should talk somewhere else

**From: Xabi Alonso**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
That’s okay. My room is empty. Come over in 5?

**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Xabi Alonso**  
yeah. see ya soon mate

 

**From: Oscar Emboaba**  
 **To: Eden Hazard**  
are you sleeping with my roommate?

**From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
hell yes

**From: Oscar Emboaba**  
 **To: Eden Hazard**  
why?

**From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
hes human, willing, and fantastic in bed.

**From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
why? you jealous?

**From: Oscar Emboaba**  
 **To: Eden Hazard**  
no

_...oh fuck. Was he?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for ruining Stevie and Xabi's adorable bliss. Also, just know that if you _ever_ call anyone a fag or a faggot even 'just as a joke' I will find you and I will kill you.


	10. Football Tryouts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cris tries out for the school football team.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prepare your torches and pitchforks. Shall I expect the angry mob outside my house sometime tomorrow?
> 
> I really hope the writing in this chapter doesn't suck, but I'm sorry if it does.

Cris was terrified as he joined the football team for training. Mr Mourinho said he wanted to watch him train with the team before deciding whether or not he wanted him.

Once his foot touched the ball, though, all of his nerves disappeared completely. He felt right at home. It was strange, he hadn’t played since he was a little kid (excluding his lessons with Sergio), and yet, he felt more comfortable here than he ever had anywhere else in his life. This was where he belonged. The sound of boots connecting with balls, the smells of dirt and sweat, the straining of muscles beneath calloused skin, they all held an unexplainable familiarity for him.

If he had learned anything from that training, it was that football was pure euphoria. There was love and passion, right along with all the sweat, blood, and tears. It was as essential to life as breathing for him, and as natural, too. Now that he had had a taste of it, he couldn’t imagine life without it.

After he had showered and changed, he reported to Mr Mourinho’s office, as per his instructions. He hesitantly knocked on the door. When he heard a faint ‘Come in.’ he cracked the door open and peeked his head inside.

“Ah, Cris. Have a seat.” Mr Mourinho motioned to one of the leather chairs in front of his desk. Cris took a seat, trying to find a discreet way to wipe his sweaty palms on his pants. “You were fantastic out there.” he said, resting his elbows on the table and leaning forward as he spoke.

“Oh. Thank you.” Cris had to fight to remain calm. What he really wanted to do was jump up and down and yell ‘I did it! I did it!’ but right now he really needed to _not_ act like a five year old.

“Congratulations. You’re on the team.” Mr Mourinho smiled (which, according to Sergio, he didn’t do often) as he gave Cris the good news.

“Thank you, Mr Mourinho! Thank you so much!” Cris was grinning from ear to ear.

“You earned it, Cristiano.” Mourinho said as he moved from behind his desk to sit in the chair next to Cris. “Now, let’s talk about your future in football.”

Cris smiled “Sounds great!” This was the most exciting thing to have ever happened to him in his whole life.

“How are your grades?”

“My grades are alright. I’m no straight A student, but I’ve never failed anything.”

“Good, good. We wouldn’t want any academic suspensions, now would we? Do you have any other activities taking up your free time?”

“No, sir.”

“You sure? No girlfriend? ...boyfriend?”

“Um...n-no, sir.” Cris was confused by the shift in the conversation. “Does that matter?”

“I just wanted to know if there was anything or anyone else competing for your time.” Mr Mourinho put what Cris assumed was meant to be a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “Football is hard work, Cristiano. I need to know that you are prepared to put in all the time and effort that is necessary for success. Are you? Are you prepared to do whatever it takes to play football?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“You _think_ so?”

“I mean yes. I will do whatever it takes.”

“Good, because getting into the starting XL is hard work.” Cris almost jumped out of his skin when he felt the hand that wasn’t on his shoulder rest on his knee. “Even for a talented, handsome, boy like you.”

“M-Mr Mourinho?” Cris had become uncomfortably aware of how close they were sitting.

“Just relax, Cristiano.” the older man breathed into his ear as his hand began to trail upwards. “You’re a very good looking boy. Did you know that? Maybe it’s time I got to see a little bit more of you...”

“Um, Mr Mourinho, I’m not comforta-” Cris was cut off by the manager’s lips on his. He froze, but the other man didn’t seem to notice, or else he just didn’t care.

“Now, Cristiano, didn’t you just say you would do whatever it takes?”

“Well, y-yeah but I thought that meant training and eating healthy and-”

“Shut up. There’s no need to be difficult, Cristiano. Just do as I say.”

“No!” Cristiano shot to his feet and headed for the door. He had almost reached it when he was shoved against the wall. The manager had him pressed flat up against the wall and was holding his hands firmly behind his back.

“I tried to do this the easy way. You’re the one that chose to make this difficult.” that was the last thing Cris heard before his head was slammed into the wall and he blacked out.

* * *

When Cris finally came to, the first thing he noticed was that he was completely naked. His clothes had been tossed in a pile in the opposite corner of the room. He was lying on his stomach with his hands handcuffed to the leg of the desk.

He looked up to see Mr Mourinho sitting at the very same desk, filing paperwork as if nothing was out of the ordinary. It was like he didn’t have a naked 17 year old boy chained to the desk in his office.

Mourinho glanced down and their eyes met. The manager smiled. “Oh, good. You’re awake.”

“Why’d you even bother waiting.” Cris spit out.

“It’s no fun to fuck someone who’s unconscious.” he said bluntly. Cris had figured out by now that those were his manager’s intentions, but hearing it said aloud sent a shudder down his spine. “You can stop glancing at the door.” the man said, not even bothering to look up from his paperwork this time. “It’s locked. And even if it wasn’t, everyone else has gone home. We’re the only people left in this entire building.”

Fuck. There went his last chance. If only he wasn’t chained to this fucking desk he could try to climb out the window or something. Second story be damned. “You gonna uncuff me anytime soon?”

“You gonna behave anytime soon?” he shot back, looking Cris in the eye this time. ‘That’s what I thought.”

Mr Mourinho left his desk and crouched down on the floor next to Cris. “Now,” he said “let’s see what we have here.” he slowly ran his hand up and down Cris’s back. “Oh, Cristiano. So beautiful.” he muttered as his hand came to rest on the boy’s ass, giving it a rough squeeze. “You have two options, Cris.” he said as he abruptly stood and moved towards the cabinet at the other end of his office. “Option 1, you can be a good boy and let me fuck you, and make things much much easier for yourself. Or, option 2, you can fight, which will not stop me from fucking you, but it will make things a lot more unpleasant for you.”

Cris shuddered. He was terrified, but that didn’t mean he was just going to lay there and let this bastard rape him. He wasn’t going down without a fight. Mourinho sighed as Cris spat in his direction. “Option 2 it is.” he moved away from the cabinet and back towards Cris. He leaned in close to whisper in his ear. “In that cabinet, Cristiano, is lube. I want you to know that you had the option to make this so much easier on yourself. I want you to know that only feet away is something that could have made this nearly painless. But you didn’t want it.” The older man began to slowly undress, taking his time as he watched Cris begin to tremble.

Cris closed his eyes as tight as he could. _It’s going to be okay. It’s going to be okay. It’ll all be over soon. It’s going to be okay._ He could feel Mourinho behind him, getting ready to... _oh god_. Cris screamed as he felt the worst pain he had ever felt in his entire life. He screamed until he thought his voice would give out and he was sure that his throat had been torn to ribbons. “Cristiano, if you don’t stop now, I’ll stop you myself.” But the words of warning meant nothing to Cris. His whole body was on fire. His vision had gone black and his heart was beating at a million miles per hour as the manager thrust quickly in and out of him.

He didn’t even care when he felt himself being gagged. All he could think about was the pain. The neverending pain. He couldn’t breathe. He felt like his whole body was being torn apart with every thrust his tormentor made.

After what felt to Cris like an eternity, Mourinho finally pulled out. He stood up and got dressed, collecting his things and getting ready to go home. He unlocked Cris’s handcuffs almost as an afterthought. “Welcome to the first team, you stupid little slut.” he called as he walked out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have nothing to say except that I am so so sorry. This was the first major plot point that I ever came up with for this story, so it's really important, even if you guys are gonna be really mad. I couldn't avoid it. If it makes you feel any better, I promise that within the next two chapters you will finally hear Fernando's story.


	11. Friendship Is a Strange Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know you all want to hear about Cris but this is going to be another texting chapter that includes pretty much all of the guys. Sorry but I need a chapter to just get back into the swing of things before I write a chapter as heavy as the next one is going to be.
> 
> My friend Alice's poems were the inspiration behind Xabi's in this chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. It's been a while. Sorry about that. I'm back now. Time to get back on the horse and all that.
> 
> Just fyi i made the necessary changes to that paragraph in the last chapter.

**From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Cesar Azpilicueta**  
hey man i need your advice 

**From: Cesar Azpilicueta  
 **To: Eden Hazard  
**** oh really? on what? 

**From: Eden Hazard  
 **To: Cesar Azpilicueta  
**** remember that guy i told you about? the one whos dating the prude? 

**From: Cesar Azpilicueta  
 **To: Eden Hazard  
**** you mean the one who actually understands the meaning of a committed relationship and therefore refuses to have sex with you? yeah i remember him 

**From: Eden Hazard  
 **To: Cesar Azpilicueta  
**** shut up dave. nobody asked for your opinion 

**From: Cesar Azpilicueta  
 **To: Eden Hazard  
**** for the last time, my name is not dave! and did you not just send me a text asking for my opinion? 

**From: Eden Hazard  
 **To: Cesar Azpilicueta  
**** dude youve just gotta get used to being called dave because nobody can say your name. hell youre my best friend and i still cant say your name. fine youre right. i asked for your opinion. are you going to help me or not? 

**From: Cesar Azpilicueta  
 **To: Eden Hazard  
**** if you call me dave then im gonna start calling you hazard lights 

**From: Eden Hazard  
 **To: Cesar Azpilicueta  
**** wtf?? 

**From: Cesar Azpilicueta  
 **To: Eden Hazard  
**** get it? cuz your last name is hazard... okay nevermind. so what do you need advice about?? 

**From: Eden Hazard  
 **To: Cesar Azpilicueta  
**** well, its that guy. oscar. i mean, at first i just wanted to fuck him, but now i think im starting to actually like him? 

**From: Cesar Azpilicueta  
 **To: Eden Hazard  
**** WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY BEST FRIEND??? 

**From: Eden Hazard  
 **To: Cesar Azpilicueta  
**** fuck you 

**From: Cesar Azpilicueta  
 **To: Eden Hazard  
**** no but seriously man, if you like him you should go for it. this could be a good thing for you. you could learn to be monogamous and shit 

**From: Eden Hazard  
 **To: Cesar Azpilicueta  
**** you are not helpful 

 

**From: David Beckham  
 **To: Frank Lampard  
**** nah mate thats a stupid idea 

**From: Frank Lampard  
 **To: David Beckham  
**** no its not. youve had a crush on him for years 

**From: David Beckham  
 **To: Frank Lampard  
**** but he doesnt like me like that 

**From: Frank Lampard  
 **To: David Beckham  
**** oh for fucks sake becks there is not a single person at this school, gay or straight, who would not date you if you asked 

**From: David Beckham  
 **To: Frank Lampard  
**** i was being serious, frankie 

**From: Frank Lampard  
 **To: David Beckham  
**** so was i. all youd have to do is say the word and youd have this whole school on their knees 

**From: David Beckham  
 **To: Frank Lampard  
**** trying to have a serious conversation with you is like trying to pull sergio away from a mirror 

**From: Frank Lampard  
 **To: David Beckham  
**** i am being completely serious! i would totally be on my knees for you! john says he would too. wait, that gives me an idea... ;) 

**From: David Beckham  
 **To: Frank Lampard  
**** NO 

 

**From: Steven Gerrard  
 **To: Xabi Alonso  
**** we need to work on that poetry project 

**From: Xabi Alonso  
 **To: Steven Gerrard  
**** Roses are red  
Violets are blue  
You’re a complete dickhead  
I’m not working with you

**From: Steven Gerrard  
 **To: Xabi Alonso  
**** wtf xabi? whats wrong with you? 

**From: Xabi Alonso  
 **To: Steven Gerrard  
**** Dear Steven Gerrard,  
Are you scared you make me hard?  
Only in your fucking dreams.  
Because you’ll never hear my screams.  
You’ll just jack off day and night.  
Wishing I was in your sight.  
So stay the fuck away from me.  
My standards aren’t that low.  
You’re a homophobic piece of shit.  
That’s one thing that I know.

 

**From: David Luiz  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba  
**** why is this all of a sudden such a problem? you knew my feelings about this when we started dating 

**From: Oscar Emboaba  
 **To: David Luiz  
**** i guess i just didnt really think about it until now. idk david... i just dont get why its such a big deal to you 

**From: David Luiz  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba  
**** oscar we are not going to go through this again. i refuse to have sex before im married. end of discussion 

 

**From: Oscar Emboaba  
 **To: Eden Hazard  
**** we should talk 

 

**From: Cristiano Ronaldo  
 **To: Fernando Torres  
**** help. mourinhos office. come quickly 


	12. It's Too Late To Realize You've Made Mistakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so poorly written!
> 
> I live for your comments, so let me know what you think! :)
> 
> The chapter title comes from the song She Falls Asleep, Part 2 by Mcfly. It's one of my all time favorite songs

Fernando gently sat Cris down on the edge of his bed. He stood there awkwardly for a moment, before finally deciding to sit down next to him. Cris just stared at the carpet, still trying to process everything.

Fernando had helped him back to their room, and even helped him get cleaned up and into a fresh set of clothing, but throughout all of it, Cristiano refused to make eye contact of any kind, even for just a second.

“Cris.” He said softly, putting what he hoped was a reassuring hand on the other boy’s shoulder. “Cris please look at me.”

“I can’t” Cris’ voice broke.

“Cris I... I don’t know what to say. I’m so sorry.”

After a long pause, Cris finally whispered “You knew.”

Fernando just sat there in silence, not fully understanding what Cris meant.

“You knew.” Cris finally turned his head to look at his roommate. “You knew what was going to happen. You must have.” His words were accusatory, but his eyes were pleading. He wanted so badly to be contradicted.

“Oh god, Cris. No. I had no idea.” Fernando’s voice was shaky. His eyes were welling up with tears, but he was doing his best to fight them off. “I thought... I thought it was only me.” he whispered the last few words, barely able to get them out at all. “I thought you would be okay. He never hurt anyone else. Anyone but me. I thought...” he sighed “It doesn’t matter what I thought. I was wrong. And I’m so so sorry. It’s all my fault.”

Cris just looked at him. “So I was right? He hurt you too? That’s what’s been going on this whole time?”

Fernando looked down at the sheets as he nervously twisted them between his shaking fingers, trying to find the right words to say. “I-” he began, before seemingly changing his mind. “We-” he tried again, but still couldn’t get the words out. He was fighting back the tears with everything he had, but he just couldn’t hold them in any longer. So he let go. “Yes.” he said, tasting the salt water on his lips. “Last year the football team got a new coach, Mourinho. For the first few weeks everything was normal. Then one day after practice he called me into his office...” He didn’t want to have to say these words, especially not to Cris, but now, after everything that had happened, he owed him the truth. “You have to understand, football was my everything. And I was damn good at it, too. I was even going to go pro. But then he told me that if I didn’t do what he said, I would be off of the team. Done. My whole career would be over before it had even begun. But if I did what he wanted, I would start every game, and even become the captain once Becks graduated.

“So I did what he wanted. Every. Single. Goddamn. Day. He would call me into his office and I would go. I did everything he said, obeyed his every order perfectly. I never fought back. Not once. I just let him rape me, day after day after day, for the whole _fucking_ year. I never even tried to stop him.

“You know,” he mused bitterly “One time I asked him why me. Why he was doing this to me and no one else. He said I was the only boy who had ever tempted him, and I believed him. _I fucking believed him!_ I shouldn’t have, but I did and _shit Cris_ I thought you were safe. I thought everyone else was safe and now I’m just so goddamn _angry_. I’m angry at myself for believing him, and for letting you go to that practice even though I thought it was a bad idea. But mostly I’m just furious that he so much as laid a finger on you. _Jesus fucking christ, Cris._ I swear I never thought he would do that to anyone else. Anyone but me.”

There was a long silence before Cris finally asked “So how did you get out?”

Fernando let out a bitter laugh. “On the last day of school, he called me to his office again. Said he wanted to ‘say goodbye.’ And while he was ‘saying goodbye’ Daniel Agger walked in on us.

“That’s when it all hit me. Everything that I was allowing to happen, it all came crashing down. That’s when I finally decided that I needed to get away. Away from him and away from football. I’ve wanted nothing to do with it ever since. That’s also when I decided to tell Sergio about everything.”

“Why didn’t you tell him before?”

“Because I didn’t want him to know. I didn’t want him to know how weak and pathetic I am.”

Cristiano took a minute to let it all sink in before he spoke again. “If Sergio knows,” he paused and tried to regain his composure “if he knows what Mourinho did to you, why is he still on the team?” Cris was trying not to cry, but failing miserably. “and why did he bring me there?”

It was a long time before Fernando finally answered. “Because Sergio still thinks that all humans are invincible. That he’s invincible. In his mind, we’re all made of steel and there’s nothing that could possibly hurt us. But in truth, we’re all just made of porcelain, aren’t we? One little touch and we shatter.”


	13. This Isn't How I Thought Things Would Be

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry It's been so long. I was really blocked. Hopefully I will have the next chapter up more quickly.

Xabi was making his way out of the English classroom when someone grabbed him by the arm, swung him around, and pinned him up against the wall.

“Look, you have to talk to me sometime. I am not going to fail English because you refuse to work with me.” Steven’s voice was quiet, so as to keep the conversation private, but still aggressive.

“Fine, just get the fuck off me.” Xabi tried to push the boy away but to no avail.

“Thank god. Meet me in my room after dinner.” he was about to turn away when Xabi’s voice stopped him.

“Sorry, but I can’t tonight.”

“What? Why not?”

“I have a date.” Xabi said, a bit smugly.

“ _A date?!?_ ”

“Yeah, it’s this thing where two people who like each other decide that they want to spend more time together, so they hang out, or go to the movies, or get dinner, etc.”

Steven ignored Xabi’s jibe, his mind still processing the new information. “With who?”

“Alvaro.”

“Alvaro? As in _Arbeloa?_ ”

“Yeah, Arbeloa. He asked me out a few days ago and I think he’s really funny and sweet so I said yes. Do you have a problem with that?” Xabi’s tone was casual, but his eyes were challenging.

“No, not at all.” Steven shoved away from him and walked off.

* * *

When Iker got up to answer the knock on his door, the last person he had expected to see was Eden. They didn’t have anything planned. “ _Eden?_ ”

“Oh, hi Iker. Is Oscar in?”

“Um, yeah...” Iker gave Eden a questioning look, but Eden ignored it, instead, choosing to push past Iker and into the room. But after only a few steps, he turned back to Iker and winked, whispering “Tonight?”

“Yeah, of course.” Iker whispered back.

“Um... do you think you could give us a minute?”

“Sure, no problem.” he said, still somewhat confused as he left the room, closing the door behind him.

* * *

“Becks! Becks I know you can hear me! Open the fucking door!” Iker continued to bang incessantly on his best friend’s door.

“Jesus fucking christ, Iker! Gimme a bloody second! I was in the shower!” Becks said as he opened up the door, wearing nothing but a towel.

“Jesus, Becks, stop being so fit, you’re making the rest of us feel bad!” Iker said as he walked into the room and collapsed on his best friend’s bed.

Becks tried to hide his blush. “Oh so you think I’m fit, do ya?”

“David Beckham, anyone who doesn’t think you’re fit is either blind or clinically insane.”

Becks smiled. Maybe Frank was right after all.

* * *

“So,” Eden said somewhat awkwardly. “You wanted to talk?”

“Yeah... I just...” Oscar sighed.

Eden slowly moved forward and sat down next to him on the bed, just waiting silently for Oscar to continue.

“I just... I don’t know. I never wanted to be one of those people who waited until marriage to have sex. And... I never wanted to be one of those people who’s only ever had sex with one person their whole life. That’s just not me. I love David. I really love him. But I just... I don’t think I can do what he’s asking me to.”

They looked at each other for a long time before Eden leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to Oscar’s lips. As he began to pull away, Oscar grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him back, connecting their lips once more. The kiss grew steadily deeper and more passionate. Before they knew it, both their shirts had been discarded and Oscar was lying beneath Eden on the bed.

“Eden” Oscar breathed as the other boy stopped sucking on his neck and began kissing a trail down his chest and stomach to the waistband of his pants.

Eden looked up at him. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

Oscar knew that this was his last chance to turn back, and he should take it, but he just didn’t want to. “Yes.”

* * *

Xabi got back from his date with Alvaro to find Steven standing in the middle of his room waiting for him.

“Steven? How did you even get in here?”

“Arteta let me in.”

Xabi sighed. “Of course he did.”

“Look... I... I wanted to... apologize.”

Xabi raised his eyebrows.

“I... It’s just... I... I...” He took a deep breath. “I like you.” The words came out in a rush.

“You” Xabi spluttered. “You what?”

“I-I’m not gay. Or... I never thought I was but... but then you came along. Then you came along and all of a sudden I can’t get you out of my head. Not ever. All of a sudden I would do anything to be a part of your world. I would read a thousand books just to speak your language. And... and I don’t want any of those girls anymore. Fuck, I don’t want anyone anymore because they’re not you. I had a girlfriend, you know. Her name was Alex, but she broke up with me because ever since you came into the picture I didn’t want her. All I want is you. You’re the only person I ever think about. The only person I care about. And I know there’s nothing I can say to make up for the way I treated you, but I want you to know that I never meant it. I... I was just scared. I was scared of myself and everything I was feeling and I took it out on you and I’m so sorry. I can’t take back what I said, but I promise you that I will never ever stop trying to make it up to you. I can’t lose you, Xabi. I just can’t.” His voice broke on the last sentence and he looked down at the floor, awaiting rejection.

“Stevie… I…” Xabi didn’t know what to say or how to say it, so instead he moved forward until he was standing directly in front of Stevie, their faces centimeters apart. They stood there for a moment, their breath mingling in the air in front of them before Xabi grabbed a fistfull of Stevie’s shirt, pulled him closer, and kissed him.


	14. Turning Points

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kind of happy with this chapter, but keep in mind that I didn't spend nearly as much time editing as I usually do. I'd love to know what you think!!!

Daniel was reaching for the door to Fernando’s room, hoping to get another good blowjob before school started, when someone grabbed him by the shoulder and shoved him back against the opposite wall, hard.

“What the fuck?!?” he screamed before his eyes focused on the figure pinning him to the wall. “Well, well, well,” he said, eyebrows raised, “If it isn’t Sergio Ramos.”

“Shut up.” Sergio spat, fuming “You don’t get to talk. Right now your are going to listen.”

“Whatever you say, sweetcheeks.” Daniel taunted, not at all pleased with Sergio’s newfound backbone.

“You,” Sergio slammed him even harder into the wall “are going to leave Fernando the fuck alone. Do you understand? I don’t give a flying fuck if you know his secret, you are going to stay away from him. If you ever touch him, or speak to him, if you ever so much as come within 50 feet of him ever again, I will tear you apart. Are we clear? I will tear you apart before you can say so much as one syllable of what you know.” and with that, Sergio stormed off to his room, leaving a very stunned Daniel behind.

* * *

 

“So...” Xabi said, looking down at the boy lying next to him. All he and Steven had done last night was kiss, and yet, he was happier than he had ever been.

“So...” Stevie said, looking up at him, the picture of contentment.

“I guess you don’t... I mean... You probably don’t want...”

Stevie lifted himself up, resting on one arm and looking at Xabi with confused eyes. “Xabi?”

“I suppose you’ll want this to stay secret.” Xabi whispered, not making eye contact with the other boy.

“Of course I don’t!” Stevie said, lifting Xabi’s chin and looking straight into his deep brown eyes. “Xabi I made a mistake, but now I’m trying to make up for it, and if I have to stand on the roof of this building and shout to the whole world that I have feelings for you and only you to get you to believe me, I will.”

Xabi just smiled that smile that made Stevie’s heart melt and Stevie knew that Xabi really was the only thing in the world he wanted.

* * *

 

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
hey you wanna get some pizza with me tonight?

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
like at a real pizza place that is not on this campus?

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
yeah...

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
you never want to leave campus you lazy ass, whats changed now?

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
i just thought it would be fun... i havent gotten to spend enough time with you lately because of school and football

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
“i havent gotten to spend enough time with you” who the fuck are you and what have you done with my best friend?

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
jesus Iker i was trying to ask you out on a fucking date!

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
...what?

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
i really like you and lamps said that i should just go for it but you dont seem like you want to so can we just pretend i never asked im sorry please dont make this weird youre my best friend

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
woah woah woah calm down becks. as a general rule, you shouldnt take relationship advice from lamps, but youre lucky because this time he was right. i would love to go get pizza with you :)

“Becks what the fuck are you doing?” Sergio asked as he walked out of the bathroom to find his roommate jumping up and down and doing a weird little dance on top of his bed.

“I’ve got a date!”

* * *

 

“Eden, wait.” Oscar said, stopping the boy halfway to the door. “Don’t... don’t tell anyone? Please?”

“I won’t” Eden assured, all cockiness had deserted him now. Something about Oscar made him want to be gentle and kind like he never had been before.

“And Eden?” Eden turned again. “Do you think... we could do that again sometime?” Oscar blushed.

“Of course.” Eden moved towards the blushing boy and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I’ll see you later, Oscar.”

* * *

 

“We have to go to school, Cris.” Fernando said, pulling him closer.

“I don’t want to.” Cris mumbled into his shoulder.

“We have to, it’s Monday.” he said, though he made no move to get up.

“Can’t we just stay here forever?”

“If only.” Fernando reluctantly untangled himself from Cris and got out of bed.

“Cris?” Fernando asked hesitantly as they gathered their school things into their bags.

“Yeah?”

“Will you promise me something?”

“Of course.” Fernando was startled by the sincerity he found in Cristiano’s eyes.

“Promise me you won’t go back to football practice?”

“Of course I won’t” Cristiano looked genuinely surprised. “Will you promise me something in return?”

“Of course.”

“You won’t tell anyone what happened to me? Especially Sergio? It would kill him if he knew.”

“I promise.”

* * *

 

“You can’t just ignore me all weekend and then act like everything’s normal.” Sergio said after Cris had taken the seat next to him and started chatting about why mechanical pencils are superior to normal ones.

“Okay, you wanna know what happened?” Cris asked, sounding annoyed.

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I do.” At that moment Mr Redknapp arrived and their conversation was brought down to a whisper.

“Fernando told me everything.” he said, ignoring the shocked look on Sergio’s face and continuing. “and I was ignoring you because I was trying to be there for him. He needed me.” That shut Sergio up for the rest of class.

* * *

 

Cristiano had done well not to show it, but in truth, he was numb. He had been ever since the moment he stepped out of his room that morning. He was just going through the motions without really being a part of what was going on around him. He couldn’t wait until the day was over and he could go back to his room and back into that safe little bubble that he and Fernando had created around themselves.

When Fer was there, he felt safe. When Fer was there, everything was going to be okay. But now, the spell of the weekend had been broken and he had to face reality.

“Cris, I have something I need to say.” Cris looked up to see a fidgeting Sergio sit across from him. They were the only two people at the table.

“Okay.” he said, trying to come back to reality, trying not to go back to being numb. But who was he kidding? He was always going to be numb.

“I really really like you and I know I haven’t always been great at showing it, but I was wondering if you would maybe want to go out with me?”

“You want me to be your boyfriend?” Cris tried to push past the numbness engulfing him to think clearly but he just couldn’t. He couldn’t make himself care, so he just gave in and let his body work on autopilot.

“Yes.” Sergio said, the hope clear on his face.

“Okay.” Cris smiled, hoping it looked genuine.


	15. It's Complicated

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry about all the long breaks. this story is giving me a headache

“So,” David Luiz said cheerily as he sat down at the lunch table and slung an arm around his boyfriend. They had the afternoon off to give the teachers time to actually grade shit. “I thought we could go out today. I don’t like fighting with you, and I want us to be okay. How about we go see a movie? Your pick.”

“Um, yeah. Sure.” Oscar fidgeted.

“You don’t sound very enthusiastic.” David’s face fell.

“I’m just tired.”

“Didn’t you get much sleep last night?”

Oscar let out a humorless laugh. “No. I had some trouble falling asleep.” Trouble named Eden. He felt a vibration in his pocket and pulled his phone out, carefully angling the screen so that David couldn’t read it.

 **From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
hey you

Oscar smiled before typing his reply.

 **From: Oscar Emboaba**  
 **To: Eden Hazard**  
hey yourself

“Who is it?” David asked. Not nosy, just politely curious.

“Oh just my English tutor, Ramires.” he tried to casually change the subject. “Fergie assigned me this huge project and it’s so stupid because...” he was halfway through his long rant about the idiocy of both Romeo and Juliet as well as every single character in Twelfth Night when his phone buzzed again. His speech slowly trailed off as he glanced at the screen.

 **From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
when can i see you again?

He bit his lip and thought for a moment before finally beginning to tap on the keys.

 **From: Oscar Emboaba**  
 **To: Eden Hazard**  
idk eden. i think i just need to figure out what the hell im doing

The response came immediately

 **From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
the damage is done oscar. its already happened. doing it a second time wont make it any worse

 **From: Oscar Emboaba**  
 **To: Eden Hazard**  
yeah youre right

 **From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
can i see you tonight?

 **From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
i miss you

 **From: Oscar Emboaba**  
 **To: Eden Hazard**  
i saw you like four hours ago

 **From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
ik

 **From: Eden Hazard**  
 **To: Oscar Emboaba**  
but thats too long for me

Oscar fought back a grin as he turned to David. “We should totally go see a movie, but then I have to get back to finish up my homework.”

  


* * *

  


Cristiano was sitting with Sergio in the library, working on a project for he didn’t even know what class. Sergio leaned studiously over a pile of books (a first for him) while Cristiano tried to surreptitiously text underneath the table.

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
i cant do this

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
do what?

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
this

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
sitting here and pretending that everything is okay when nothing is okay

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
calm down cris. its going to be okay. just chill out and work on the project

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
i would love to work on the project only i dont even know what goddamn class its for

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
well that is quite the predicament

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
i hate you you useless piece of shit

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
:D  <3

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
go fuck yourself

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
only if you watch

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
god you are so annoying

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
its part of my charm

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
i miss the pouty Fernando who just glared at people and never made jokes

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
dont worry. hes still around. hes just no longer for you

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
and why is that?

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
because youre different

“Earth to Cris.” Cris’ head shot up to find Sergio staring at him quizzically. “You okay there?”

“Yeah... I was just um... checking the time...”

“Well,” Sergio said, looking amused. “If it takes you that long to read the time you might be in the wrong maths class.” He grinned, winked, and went back to work. As soon as he wasn’t looking Cris went back to his phone.

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
he knows im not working

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
so tell him you feel sick and come back to our room. im lonely

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
hey. no chick flick moments

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
oh god youve been watching supernatural again

 **From: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
 **To: Fernando Torres**  
;)  <3

 **From: Fernando Torres**  
 **To: Cristiano Ronaldo**  
just get your ass back here, nerd

  


* * *

  


**From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
OH GOD SERGIO HELP

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
what now iker?

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
I THINK IM DYING

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
iker you are not dying

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
YES I AM

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
no youre not

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
what the hell makes you think youre dying

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
MY ASSHOLE

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
ITS NOT SORE

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
ITS SUPPOSED TO BE SORE

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
ITS ALWAYS SUPPOSED TO BE SORE

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
OH GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
seriously iker??? stop texting me about your need to be fucked

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
NO

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
YOU HAVE TO HELP ME

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?????????????

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
NOT LIKE THAT YOU FUCKING IDIOT JUST TELL ME WHAT TO DO

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
GO GET FUCKED

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
I AM DOING MY BEST TO BE FAITHFUL HERE BUT IF I DO NOT GET SOME ACTION SOON I AM GOING TO IMPLODE

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
you should be texting becks, bro. not me

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
OH YEAH WHAT A GREAT IDEA SERGIO I SHOULD JUST TEXT THE GUY I REALLY REALLY LIKE AND ASK HIM FOR A FUCK

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
whats the problem? thats what you do with everyone else

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
i dont need you to remind me im a slut i need you to give me some fucking helpful advice you useless dildo

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
theres a good idea. use a dildo

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
i dont own a dildo sergio

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
really?????? how do YOU not own a dildo???????????????????

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
I HAVE NEVER NEEDED ONE BEFORE IVE ALWAYS BEEN TOO BUSY HAVING REAL DICKS UP MY ASS

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
oh ffs iker meet me outside in 5 and we can go buy you one

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: Sergio Ramos**  
I LOVE YOU BROTHER

 **From: Sergio Ramos**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
fuck off

  


* * *

  


**From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
hey whats up?

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
nothing. just shopping with sergio

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
oh cool. what ya shoppin for?

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
just random shit. razors. toothpaste. you know... manly stuff

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
rofl iker ive never heard toothpaste described as manly before

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
since when do you go shopping with sergio anyway?

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To: David Beckham**  
my toothpaste is very manly thank you very much

 **From: Iker Casillas**  
 **To:David Beckham**  
and i just needed him to help me pick out my... toothpaste

 **From: David Beckham**  
 **To: Iker Casillas**  
thats seriously weird mate


End file.
